I recently read a book by Dr. Wayne Dyer titled Memories of Heaven. It’s a collection of short stories told by parents about their children’s fascinating stories and proclamations of being with God in heaven before birth. As I read the book, a few of my own children’s stories were validated. I had no idea so many other parents have experienced the same thing. Here’s one of my stories.
Before my daughter’s birth, or even the thought of her birth, back in the My Space days (for me 2005-2007) I blogged about a bizarre but comforting phrase that popped into my head every morning and frequently throughout the day. The thought was a little voice that said “I love you.” In the beginning I thought it was so weird that myself was telling myself “I love you”…almost every day. “How selfish” I thought, but as it continued I accepted that maybe it was God or my grandmother telling me “I love you.” This made it feel more normal. I continued to be perplexed at how and why…even when I thought I’d forget for one day…there it was “I love you.”
About 2 years after it began it disappeared, and I didn’t even realize it–until my daughter started talking. The first time she told me “I love you mommy,” brought tears to my eyes and made life so totally worth it! From that day on she tells me multiple times a day and at random “I love you.” She’ll pause her favorite show on YouTube and yell “MOMMY!” I’ll come running in thinking there’s a minor emergency, and she’ll politely say “I love you.” Today I dropped her off at her class, she got half way through the door, ran back out in a hurry, tugged on my sleeve, and whispered in my ear “I love you,” then happily ran into her classroom.
Her consistency made me remember the little voice that paraded through my mind continuously for two years “I love you.” I can consciously think “I love you,” but it’s not the voice…it’s not the same. I can’t help but think it was her the whole time. God proves to us what is real in the unseen, we just don’t take the initiative to realize it…silly, left brained humans we are!
Her diligent nature also encourages me to love myself. She’s so deep in her five years of wisdom! Loving yourself is hard…really hard…I’m still figuring it out—trying to erode years of low self-esteem and unworthiness—it’s getting easier and more clear so that’s good.
Pay attention to those little “downloads” you receive either in an odd thought, or in a repeating phrase that may come through friends, billboards, coworkers, kids, and spouses—it may be the voice of something divine trying to get your attention.